Posted May 9, 2008 by Conor_C :: 2 comments

TURN YOUR HEAD AND COIF

I had the misfortune of catching the last half hour of Ghost Rider the other day. I figured a film about the only comic book character to defeat the mighty Galactus must be worth a look. And Nicolas Cage is a good actor... isn't he? I got flashes of Raising Arizona, Wild At Heart, Guarding Tess, Leaving Las Vegas... What am I worried about? This guy is great! But a little voice kept whispering in the back of my head: "Put the bunny back in the box". Thirty minutes later and this trickle of skepticism had become a gushing torrent. Filmmakers always say: you can make a bad film out of a good script, but you can't make a good film out of a bad script. I'd imagine the same could be said about performance. But then I got to thinking. Nicolas Cage, Oscar winner, nephew of the great Francis Ford Coppola, had to have sat down with that unsanitary document, spent an hour to two hours soiling himself with it, then, and this is the nut-buster, made a conscious decision that this was a project he would be happy to devote six months of his life to. Why?

Fair enough, the films I mentioned above were far from blockbuster hits and were early roles in Cage's career. Anyone who watches Entourage will be familiar with the game: you do one for yourself, then one for your agent, and so on... And by the time the late nineties rolled along, his agent was definitely due a few studio pics. Queue The Rock, Con Air, and Face/Off. All monster hits. Made a fortune. Agent satisfied. Now for some balance. 8MM and Bringing Out The Dead closely followed by Gone In Sixty Seconds and The Family Man. Genius really - from depressed ambulance driver to super-cool car thief, seamy private investigator to, well, family man, I guess. The next slate of projects follows a similar pattern: Adaptation and Matchstick Men followed by National Treasure and Lord Of War. The Weather Man followed by The Wicker Man (now that's symmetry for you!). Obviously I've left some out...

And this catalogue of the good, the bad and the bizarrely coifed brings us back to the laughable Johnny Blaze aka Ghost Rider. Even his agent must have had his doubts about this one. He's gotta have that bunny-in-the-box quote ringing in his ears too. There's only so much abuse a man's career can take. It's like the junkie who always said he'd never get hooked. And good ol' Nick has managed to dodge the dragon for a long time now. But the writing could be on the wall. National Treasure: Book Of Secrets... a sequel! The first sign of the addiction taking hold. Bangkok Dangerous - a remake! Things look bleak. Perhaps he's passed the point of no return. Perhaps he'll make a miraculous recovery and restore our faith in his acting ability. Or maybe he just wants his kids to have health insurance and go to a good school, what the fuck do I know? Shave it off, dude!

Words Eamonn Gray